Make That to Go

"Is he coming home with us?" Zac asked me last night, on the way to the car from the restaurant.

"No, babe. He's not."

"Where is he going?"

"He's going to his house. We are going to our house."

"But I want a friend to come over. Do you know who is going to come over?"

"No. I don't. I'll try and see if someone can come over."

Zac's desire to be around other people is getting harder for me as he's getting older. He's a naturally social kid that prefers to play with other kids or be the center of an adult's attention (preferrably two or three adults if they are in a group). I feel like I can't always offer him what he wants, in terms of a playmate or companion. As much as I try to balance his needs with the chores of running a house, going to work, and taking care of myself, I'm finding that Zac is getting more vocal about being alone.

A couple of weeks ago he repeatedly asked me where his Dad was. I told him that his "Dad" (my emphasis) lived in Florida and that he wasn't part of our life right now. He didn't understand. He just kept asking, hoping each time for a different answer.

I found out later that the FOB moved from Florida back to New Hampshire. His sister told me, when I asked if she knew why I had suddenly stopped receiving child support. Since he doesn't actually pay any money to the Texas Child Support Division, his wages are garnished. When he moves, the state that he lives in can't garnish his wages and Zac and I get nothing. I haven't even spoken to the FOB in almost a year-and-a-half.

I'm not even sure what I should do at this point. I requested a review of my case after the three year waiting period, then he started paying more and never heard anything. I could try and contact him through his myspace account, which is the only way that I have to get a hold of him, but what can I possibly say to him that would make him help me in any way? All I have is anger and even that is starting to wane. Righteous indignation is hard to maintain, even when it's justified. What I have now is no easy way to explain to Zac why he's missing half of his parents and easy way to pay all my bills, especially since I quit my second job.

I know that it's important for me to be in school, even if it makes things more financially difficult. I'm trying to find a way out of the same situation that I end up time and again with the FOB, it's just feeling hard today. I'd like a hug with a side order of responsible male role model for Zac. We could use it.

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Edit: So it turns out that I can still be pissed off, even though it does me absolutely no good. The Writ of Withholding at the Attorney General's Office can only be enforced if they have a known, verified address for the FOB. I only know where he works. He owes $5,825 in back child support, including medical. The State of Texas would have to ask for cooperation from the State of New Hampshire to serve the FOB with an order to appear in court. At least I can still mock him: Anyone want to guess who has a public myspace page?