We Are Family

Sometimes I'm amazed at how like people in a family are. Last night my Mom and Dad came over with some presents that my extended family and the FOB's family sent to Zac for his birthday. We ordered Chinese food for dinner. When dinner came we realized that we had been given an extra order of hot and spicy chicken. The dish had jalapenos and hot peppers mixed with chicken. All of the adults took one look at the food and decided that the only way we could eat any of it was to follow it with liberal dosing of maalox and antacid. Actually, the only way we could eat it would be to surgical remove our tongues - that's how strongly we feel about spicy food, in general, and jalapenos, in particular. Zac observed this family tradition by only eating white rice, a banana, and yogurt.

While my parents and I are similar, Zac and I tend to mirror each other emotionally. He's been slipping out of bed at night and coming into my bed. If I'm awake, he'll tell me that he didn't want to be in his room anymore because he's lonely. If I'm asleep, he manages to get into bed without waking me. The next morning before I'm fully awake, I'll wonder who it was that I fell asleep next to and why I don't remember it. Honestly, it's a completely confounding experience. Like: "What the hell? Why is there something simultaneously kicking me in the small of the back and hitting me in the head? Who IS this?" By the time my eyes are open, I've usually figured out that someone hasn't broken in my apartment to spoon with me. Rather, Zac's gotten out of his room.

This morning he slept all night, but woke up early. He opened my door and climbed into bed saying, "I don't want to sleep anymore. I'm lonely. I want to see what you were doing." Me: "Ummm.....zzzzzzzz" Zac: "Can I go play? You're boring" Ok, so he actually didn't say that I was boring, but that was definitely the feeling that he gave me. Maybe I'm just projecting. All I know is that he came into my room this morning and jumped into bed. Thirty seconds later he was back in the living room, playing with the 100-piece marble toy set that ManFriend gave him.

I can certainly understand some of what Zac is going through (minus the obsession with marbles and motorized toy trucks). I have some amazing friends that I don't get to see very often, if at all. Most of my friends live outside of Texas, even after five years of living here. It doesn't help that I work in an office where I sit alone in front of a computer all day. If I didn't go to the bathroom every so often, I could probably go an entire day with only talking to two or three people. By the time that I get to my study group on Wednesdays, I'm usually bursting to have adult, in-person, interaction. I feel like a puppy that's been sitting on the patio at a sliding glass door, barely able to contain its excitement to get inside the house and lick something. That's how much I want to talk when in a group of my peers.

I don't even have time (or I'll admit it - desire) to fold my laundry, let alone go out and meet people, but I can still feel an absence in my life. when Zac tells me he's lonely, I nod and say "me too" and we hug. Our professors are taking us out for a drink after class on Friday, which I'm looking forward to. It's possible that I like I might get to see...hmmm...now I've forgotten the nickname that I gave him.....oh, that's rather embarrassing. Well, I'll just say that I might get to see a friend that got married last October and lives in a suburb on the complete opposite side of Houston on Saturday, so that should be fun. Zac will be with my parents so hopefully there will be a little less loneliness all around.